Zee Most Annoyingly Pathetic Daria Fic Ever
by karmakaze
Summary: MTV owns Daria. Horrible things are happening at Lawndale High, and Tom and Daria break up. This story is supposed to suck, so please don't tell me that it sucks. By the way, if you hate purposefully lame fics, I've got a fool proof plan.DON'T read it!


Zee Most Annoyingly Pathetic Daria Fiction Ever

Note: I am not "dissing" Daria, I LOVE that show!  I'm just having a little fun with it, that's all;^)  Flames, and comments on the story's overall stupidity are accepted.  

            Brittany and Tiffany met in the middle of the hallway of Lawndale High, which was quite rare.  Sure, they were both popular, but not only were they in different grades, but Brittany was always with Kevin, and Tiffany was always with the Fashion Club.

            "You know you're not here just to get dates, Tiffany," Brittany told her.

            "_Yeaaaaah, I knoooow_," Tiffany said.

            "Have you slayed the vampire yet?" Brittany said.

            "You can't just walk up to Sandi and attack her, you know," Tiffany said.  She always talked more around Brittany than she did around anyone else.  That was because; she and Brittany worked at the same place.  Vampire Obsessed Maniacs R Us

            "Well, I'm getting really sick of walking around with that dope, Kevin!  You realize that the only reason I'm here is because I have to supervise _you_, since this is your first time slaying a vampire!  Sandi's not even a strong one!" Brittany said.

            "_Yeaaah, but I found a new vampire_, at this school!" Tiffany said.

            "Oh, _right_!  You're powers aren't _that _strong!" Brittany shouted.  Brittany had been up for a promotion in the _Bizarre Jobs _field from Vampire Slayer Training Instructor to Telemarketer of vampirish goods any day now, but she would_ never _get that promotion if Brittany, here, didn't stop Sandi from biting everyone at Lawndale!"

            "Yeah, but you might want to know, that it's Kevin," Tiffany said.  "Has he ever bitten you?"

            "Oh NO!" Brittany shouted.  With that, she ran out of the room.

……………………….Meanwhile………………………………………………………..

            Tom got kicked on his way to school, landed on the top of a building, got in a car, drove off the building, and hit Monique on his way down, shortly before falling into a ditch with a bomb in it, flying halfway across town, and landing in the middle of a Mystic Spiral, (I misspelled Mystic!!!!!  I should have spelled it Mystik!  I think I'm going to have a heart attack!) concert, and going nearly deaf, and was rushed to the hospital.  Therefore, Tom and Daria are no longer dating, and Trent is single.  Isn't that wonderful?

……………………Back to the Point…wait, what _was _the point?………………………..

            Brittany and Kevin were both vampires, terrorizing Lawndale High.  "So, Kevvy, you _knew _you were a vampire, and you never _told _me!  Ahhhhhh!" Brittany cried.

            "Well, _babe_, I thought you'd break up with me if I told you!" Kevin protested uselessly.

            "No _duh_!  Oh, _Kevvy, _now my _lips _are all _red_, and my _teeth _are all _sharp _and _pointy!  _I _hate _you!" she shouted.  "I'm going to get a _new _boyfriend who's _honest _with me!  _Waaaait _a minute!  How come _you _can stand _sunlight _if you're a _vampire_, you, you, _vampire_?"

            "Uh…new technology?" Kevin guessed.

            "You _jerk_!" Brittany said.  Then, she stepped on his foot, but now had amazing strength, as a vampire.

            "OW!  _Babe!_" he shouted.  "It's not my fault, _Sandi bit me last year_!"

…………………………………..Meanwhile……………………………………………

            Tiffany was walking down the hall with Sandi, and the rest of the fashion club, muttering brain-dead responses to everything that was said, trying to be a typical individual at Lawndale.  _Should I do it, or not?  _She had the wooden stake in her backpack, (it was cleverly disguised as lipstick,) but she wasn't about to use it.  Or, maybe she was.  I changed my mind!  Hahaha!  So, at least my story's not predictable!  So, she pulled the wooden stake out of her backpack, and tried to stab Sandi with it.  

Will she succeed?

Will Kevin and Brittany get back together?

Can this fiction get any stupider?

Find out in the next chapter!


End file.
